There are a lot of posts, slogans, jokes, comics and tv show plots that discuss parenting. But it makes me sad when I see ones that are clearly written by people who are missing the most amazing parts of being a parent AND only fixating on the rougher, more difficult, beyond un-glamorous aspects of the job. Most recently:
We spend the first 12 months teaching children to walk and talk
and the next 12 years telling them to sit down and be quiet.
First, I want to credit my own parents partially for my opinion here. Growing up, aside from being in church or if someone was ill, I don't ever remember being told to sit down or be quiet. Yes there were the rare occasions, such as Easter Sunday at church where the children stay in the "big church" during the whole service, where we had to find quiet activities to keep our little hands and little mouths busy. Yes there were places where it was either dangerous to stand up or run around (when we were in Grandpa's rowboat or walking on his dock). But I think my parents must have embraced the noise and activity of their three children or they just found creative ways to redirect it. (Or it is always possible that my 30 year old mommy brain is misremembering!)
Regardless, I don't want to spend the next 12 years telling my adorable little bundles of energy that they need to sit down or be quiet. First, there are so many fun places to take them where they don't have to do either and second, that's not the type of relationship I want to have with my children (and I am NOT the parent that wants to be their friend-- I am their mother first and foremost). We are years and years passed the "children should be seen and not heard" and even further from the "children should not be seen but belong in the nursery" mentality of the Victorians. When we go places as a family, we will go places where they don't need to be shushed and we can save the other places for the date nights where Mommy and Daddy get to spend time together.
Maybe you'll think I'm naïve-- but you are welcome to your opinion. I have noticed that a lot of the opinions or comments that I disagree with, a lot of the jokes or shows (about parenting) that other people find funny (and I don't) those are connected to people who don't really seem to enjoy being a parent.
Yes-there are THOSE DAYS. Those days include the day where I was pooped on three times, but failed to notice the third poop incident until hours after it happened (yep couldn't figure out where that smell was coming from-- it was ME!). Those days are the days where my child projectile vomited on me (while Skyping with my sister) and then her sister rolled in it leaving all three of us covered in vomit (and hours until Daddy was going to be home from work). There are those days where you haven't slept more than a hour or two at a time. There are those days where you feel hormonal (weaning from nursing), the children are clingy and cranky AND teething, you didn't get a chance to shower or even eat breakfast and it is now 2pm and you just want to scream AND are ready to pay the babysitter to come over so 1) you can shower and 2) you can talk to an adult. BUT those are THOSE days they are not ALL days.
And they are not even MOST days.
MOST days my daughters giggle and play happily. MOST days they hug me so tight and so often it would be impossible to feel sad or alone. MOST days they amaze me with the new skills they've learned, their compassion and ability to be kind to each other and me (today Sydney tried repeatedly to share her most prized possession-- her pacifier-- with me and actually tried to put it in my mouth for me). MOST days can be hectic and busy but I am so incredibly grateful that we were blessed with our girls. I think back to all of the times that I wished for them and I feel so blessed that my wish was granted.
Being a mom is in no way easy, but I love being a parent
We spend the first 12 months teaching children to walk and talk
and the next 12 years telling them to sit down and be quiet.
First, I want to credit my own parents partially for my opinion here. Growing up, aside from being in church or if someone was ill, I don't ever remember being told to sit down or be quiet. Yes there were the rare occasions, such as Easter Sunday at church where the children stay in the "big church" during the whole service, where we had to find quiet activities to keep our little hands and little mouths busy. Yes there were places where it was either dangerous to stand up or run around (when we were in Grandpa's rowboat or walking on his dock). But I think my parents must have embraced the noise and activity of their three children or they just found creative ways to redirect it. (Or it is always possible that my 30 year old mommy brain is misremembering!)
Regardless, I don't want to spend the next 12 years telling my adorable little bundles of energy that they need to sit down or be quiet. First, there are so many fun places to take them where they don't have to do either and second, that's not the type of relationship I want to have with my children (and I am NOT the parent that wants to be their friend-- I am their mother first and foremost). We are years and years passed the "children should be seen and not heard" and even further from the "children should not be seen but belong in the nursery" mentality of the Victorians. When we go places as a family, we will go places where they don't need to be shushed and we can save the other places for the date nights where Mommy and Daddy get to spend time together.
Maybe you'll think I'm naïve-- but you are welcome to your opinion. I have noticed that a lot of the opinions or comments that I disagree with, a lot of the jokes or shows (about parenting) that other people find funny (and I don't) those are connected to people who don't really seem to enjoy being a parent.
Yes-there are THOSE DAYS. Those days include the day where I was pooped on three times, but failed to notice the third poop incident until hours after it happened (yep couldn't figure out where that smell was coming from-- it was ME!). Those days are the days where my child projectile vomited on me (while Skyping with my sister) and then her sister rolled in it leaving all three of us covered in vomit (and hours until Daddy was going to be home from work). There are those days where you haven't slept more than a hour or two at a time. There are those days where you feel hormonal (weaning from nursing), the children are clingy and cranky AND teething, you didn't get a chance to shower or even eat breakfast and it is now 2pm and you just want to scream AND are ready to pay the babysitter to come over so 1) you can shower and 2) you can talk to an adult. BUT those are THOSE days they are not ALL days.
And they are not even MOST days.
MOST days my daughters giggle and play happily. MOST days they hug me so tight and so often it would be impossible to feel sad or alone. MOST days they amaze me with the new skills they've learned, their compassion and ability to be kind to each other and me (today Sydney tried repeatedly to share her most prized possession-- her pacifier-- with me and actually tried to put it in my mouth for me). MOST days can be hectic and busy but I am so incredibly grateful that we were blessed with our girls. I think back to all of the times that I wished for them and I feel so blessed that my wish was granted.
Being a mom is in no way easy, but I love being a parent